The Pulse of Orlando

I’m still screaming.





Silently, but definitely screaming.







I still haven’t fully processed everything that has happened in the past 48 hours. We had a nice singer shot dead after her concert (shooter also wasn’t from here), and then had a man shoot up a nightclub (won’t call it a gay club, because that implies exclusivity which it definitely wasn’t) and take out 50 people, injure 50 more, and then damage the lives of an entire community and an entire city. The brave Orlando police quickly engaged the situation and prevented it from being even worse by cornering him for hours and then barging in and taking him out, without even a thought of sending him to court. The man revoked his rights to living once he set out to do what he did. And the act is even worse when you realize some of the details that I will discuss later.

So now we have Marco Rubio and several politicians classify Orlando as the face of the War on Terror. And that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Orlando belongs to nobody except the people, except the citizens, except the locals that help shape Florida into the most unique yet most welcoming and successful state in all the South, and currently one of the most successful states in the entire country. We thrive off of the interactions of people of all kinds and all cultures, otherwise we wouldn’t have 60 million yearly visiting our beautiful city.

You may assume that Orlando is a large city, but that is also far from the truth. We don’t even have a million people living in the city technically. We are a large community, and that is a major difference. Interestingly enough, I used to have a theory that the larger the city, the less likely we get a mass shooting because of our sheer number of options on how to enjoy life, on how to live, and how likely large successful cities are in the end a community of people that respect, appreciate, and enjoy each other. This mass shooting curtails the theory.

Back to the community feeling of Orlando: The entire spectrum of surrounding suburbs hail themselves from Orlando. Disney, 30 minutes from actual Orlando, calls itself Orlando. Even folks from Kissimmee, Windermere, Hunter’s Creek (Large enough to be a small town), the “Winters” Towns of Park and Garden will claim they are from Orlando. And it’s not to make the conversation easier, it’s because the ideals of Orlando belongs to them. We are one of the friendliest cities in the nation, and not just towards your typical American. We are extremely GLAAD friendly, extremely friendly towards immigrants and the Latino crowd (Gone to BVL lately?), and even have a good population hailing from the Middle East, Brazil, and even as far as China.

We receive more Brazilians than any other city in the nation, while also being among the top destinations for Canadians, British, and most Central/South American countries. None of this is an accident. Some can argue that Disney formed Orlando, but the truth is Orlando transformed Disney World from a conservative, clean-cut Midwestern-influenced spot into an extremely liberal and highly open place where people from every corner of the planet to not only visit, but also come to work thanks to the College Program. Facial hair, once a cardinal Disney sin, is allowed on property. Tattoos used to disqualify you automatically from the job, but now as long as you are covered you have a shot at working for the Mouse. That wasn’t even considered back in the 70s. The diversity here is staggering.

So no, we are not the face of terror. We are still Orlando, still a very proud mesh of year-round tourism, college attitude, millenial flair and acceptance, meshed in with Southern hospitality and that Florida edge that makes us proudly weird. We love our gators cooked and larger than dinosaurs. We love our new soccer team that gets screwed over by the refs every week. We love our frustrating Orlando Magic. We love our beautiful scenery overlooking one of several massive malls. We love our Disney World and their overpriced Mickey bars. We love our other theme parks that yearly try to keep up with Disney’s stranglehold on the theme park industry. We love the new face of Orlando known as the Orlando Eye, and the impressive stretch of restaurants and entertainment known as International Drive. We just experienced a very bad day from a bad egg that isn’t from here.

Our type of success breeds enemies. On 9/11 we were a target, and miraculously nothing happened. And now we are presented with what looks like Islamic terrorism, when in actuality it’s probably something very different. The attack didn’t come from within our tight-knit community, it came from a man from outside the Orlando borders, full of rage for seeing how happy we are, and secretly pondering why he couldn’t experience the same thing. Yes Omar Mateen called and claimed he was doing this in the name of ISIS. But here is a small fact that speaks layers about him:

Mateen was a REGULAR in Pulse. He wasn’t there just once, did research, and then went crazy. Apparently he had been there a dozen times. He actually had interacted with others inside the facility. He had been drunk there before, he had danced there before. Mateen wasn’t a stranger to the world of LGBT. The man never lived in Orlando, yet made his way to this very destination several times. Does this sound like a man working for ISIS? Does this sound like a terrorist in a radical group trying to harm America? Sounds quite bizarre that a man so willing to kill them all spent so much time with them. Now, I’m not saying I have the full explanation as to why that fateful night occurred (and to be honest, I might be totally wrong), but it speaks layers that Mateen was in there as often as he was---to a point that other regulars recognize his face. He can yell ISIS but his actions are that of a broken angry man (I shall add this: an American citizen).

Could he have been a closet homosexual? That would explain his unsuccessful relationships and struggles with steroids, families, jobs (worked several of them) and life in general. It could explain his disgust for the open displays of affection from gays (according to his father, it started supposedly after a visit to Miami). He was probably battling a demon within his soul that on his final days became unbearable. Maybe his personality and his dated religious beliefs were at complete odds, and nobody was there to really help him. Maybe it was the steroids, maybe it was the mental illness nobody was willing to confront. None of this justifies his actions, but it might explain why this looks much more like a lone wolf committing a hate crime as opposed to a man following orders from a terrorist organization across the Atlantic. There’s even reports that Mateen denounced his Afghanistan ties to his family.

The attack in Paris was clearly planned. They all had their suicide vests, worked as a team, and attacked different locations during the busiest part of the night. The attack on Orlando was a man with weapons on his possession (and in the car) unleashing an attack at 2:00 A.M., when it was winding down and the bouncers and police would show up to make sure closing goes smoothly. 2:00 a.m. is not an adequate time for an attack, no matter what the death toll is. The man was angry, and it wasn’t the religion telling him to do this. He was connected to Pulse, and for God knows what reason felt like he needed to eliminate its success and its impact.

Disguising this as a simple terrorist attack from an Islamic terrorist group is dangerous, and eliminates the true issue here: the world is not a safe place to be gay, whether you want to admit it or not. Hate crimes against homosexuals exist all over the world, and even in the United States. We still have anti-gay laws that can get you fired just because of your orientation in a whopping 31 states. P.S.: Claiming that Islam is the ONLY religion doing this old-school intolerance is irresponsible. Not labeling this attack as a hate crime is also irresponsible.

Notice it happened on Latin Night. And now that the information is out that the shooter was a frequent visitor is proof that this man was (besides potentially gay or bi himself but unwilling to accept this) anti-gay, anti-Hispanic (which has become a rising concern because of Trump), and at the end of the day, anti-Muslim for his violent outburst. Do not, repeat, do not just add this on a list. We need to dissect this, and continuously prove that there is a reason for Gay Days, the Gay Pride Parades, and finding the right politicians to fight the laws that discriminate. Under Obama, we got gay marriage and gay adoption legalized federally. Love is love, end of story. Do not just file this off as another “Islamic terrorist attack." There were specific targets here, and tons of rage holding the weapon. 

This is where Orlando once again comes into play. Don’t just pray for Orlando, become Orlando. Become friendly towards all. Become accepting to all. Become personally crazy and not give two shits as to what people might think. Orlando doesn’t experience the racism of Arizona, the subtle racism of New York City (gentrification is alive and well in NYC folks ), the homophobia of Georgia, and lastly the violence of a Chicago. Orlando is part of the grand movement of accepting individuality amongst everybody willing to be themselves, and not a single moment is going to fix that. Don’t be on your knees praying for improvement, be part of the movement for improvement.

A lesser city would crumble under the circumstances. But as you see thousands of people from all over Central Florida lining up for hours to donate blood, to help out, and just do whatever it takes to get everyone back on their feet, that’s all the proof in the world displaying that Orlando is already on the road to recovery. The parks are still open, the planes are still flying in, and the parties are still continuing. This should inspire you. We’ve become part of the revolution of the South, and although our neighbors are still very much behind (Piss off South Carolina and Tennessee politicians), we are getting closer to being just as openly engaging as California, Colorado, and New York.

We can discuss gun control, radicalism, the election at any other point next month. But this month should be about a fast recovery. It took 47,000 days of Orlando history before we reached a harrowing attack of this magnitude. And it’s no accident why. Not saying Orlando is perfect (don’t get me started about the 408), but its darn near close. This has been my home for almost all of my life, and I don’t experience the horrors that other minorities and other people in general suffer in other parts of the country. For that I’m grateful. I always classify myself as Dominican-Floridian because I like mentioning the state that has accepted me for who I am without any issue.

I will not blame any group or religion or any law for what occurred that night, and neither should you. It was the actions of one man, and one man alone. He disrespected the sanctity of life, he disrespected his religion, he disrespected a nation, and disrespected a group of people that has shown nothing but love towards everyone around them. Don’t just pray---act, react, contribute, help, and try to better yourselves. One by one if we all become more loving and more accepting, then we will continue to thwart hate and will continue to revolutionize the country. Maybe our care for our neighbors will transform someone from hateful to one of us. It’s not impossible. Fewer walls, more hugs.

We are not the face of terror. We are the face of a prideful city, a prideful community, and the face of some of the best people you’ll ever meet. We’ve survived the tour groups, we’ve survived hurricanes, we’ve survived some of the craziest storms you’ll ever see (Tropical Storm Fay, never forget), we’ve survived the summers year after year, survived Shaq, survived Dwight Howard, survived I-4, survived the construction of Disney Springs, survived Eisner, and we will survive anything that the world will throw at us. This shooting is a tragedy of the highest degree, but it won’t break or define us.

The best way to honor those that vanished from our lives prematurely is to continue living, through love and through tolerance of everybody. Muslims, atheists, gays, lesbians, transgender, Hispanics, Blacks, Whites, Asians, Tourists, Gator fans, you are all welcome here. We don’t believe in borders, we don’t believe in walls keeping people out, and we don’t believe in not helping others despite where they are coming from. This is Orlando, this is who we are. If you have hate or want to spread it, get out, it’s not welcome here (Donald Trump, I am specifically and especially calling you out). I’m still silently screaming, as this tragedy has definitely affected us all, but I remain hopeful that we will be back on our feet very, very soon. And this will be the last time I write about this, because I want it to be a dark distant memory, nothing more. Orlando needs us.





Orlando will rise again. And we will not change or waver to the face of the opposition. We are and shall remain the vocal image of modern America. It’s now up to the rest of you to also step up.