The Hidden Mickey Club

Disney, I am handing you this idea for free. The best part of Disney isn’t the attractions, isn’t the food, and it isn’t even the scenery. The best part of Walt Disney World is all the little intricate details that hold it all together. Think about it, every restaurant has a story, every attraction has a story, and even most of the trees have a story as imported plants are usually associated with a sign mentioning their origin and their features. Now, lately the details have been a little slacking, with the dismal parade at Hollywood Studios and some additions that doesn’t match the themes of said park. My idea (this is free, once again) is that the Imagineers should form a squad called the Hidden Mickey Club.

The Hidden Mickey Club consists of several cast members whose sole purpose is to come up with little tiny fun additions to random parts of all the parks and resorts. Small little changes that can enhance the entire experience of the area. For example: Big thunder Mountain Railroad. On the other side is Tom Sawyer Island, one of the few remaining attractions in all Disneys around the world with Walt Disney’s personal touch. This island has a fort with guns complete with sound effects. You can actually aim and fire at the Big Thunder ride.


Now, how awesome would it be that every time a child (or adult) fires his/her gun towards Big Thunder, you can hear the gunfire on the other side while riding the train? Even better, what if we can provide a special effect that would include sand or small rocks jumping, signaling that bullets are being fired at you? Now that would make a fun addition, eh? Not only is your train out of control, but you hear gunfire while going through the next major turn. It is a small cheap addition that would make the ride much better, and much crazier.


Now we are getting to my main point, and that is the Streets of America in the Hollywood Studios. What a wasted opportunity this has become. This street’s main attraction is the excellent photo opportunities, and when Mulch, Sweat, and Shears perform. The Hidden Mickey Club would be put in charge to add little tiny things to the area to enhance it. What would I do? Very simple, New Yorkerize it. Sell actual New York merchandise, stuff like “I Love New York,” and some of the popular sports teams. The Yankees and Knicks are among the most popular professional teams in the world, why not give the New York street a little more realism by selling their product? We don’t have to stop there.

Where is the New York music? In my opinion, no man represents old-school (and perhaps even modern-day NYC) like Frank Sinatra. How much better would the streets be if you heard Frank Sinatra songs in the background? I am aware that Chicago and San Fran also exist in this section, but we should all be aware that New York is the largest section by far. To top it off, we can even have a Frank Sinatra look-alike come out and perform and dance and serenade the female guests a few times a day. And at night, the place can come alive with some popular Broadway musical numbers by street performers. Wouldn’t it be cool to see some tap-dancing and singing from musicals such as Mary Poppins, Chicago, West Side Story, and Cats? (Okay, the last one I am exaggerating)

And then, the food. Oh my, where is the New York food? Where are those massive slices of pizza? The massive hot dogs (Herbie’s Drive-In doesn’t count)? The Shish-kabob? It’s borderline-cruelty that we have a sign for New York pizza when it’s just a decoration. I know Pizza Planet is close by, but they barely qualify because it’s small personal pizzas. I am talking about the thick slices of pizza we all have heard about. There is indeed a kitchen located behind the pretzel stand (the only street food linked to New York street cuisine) and I am sure they have a space to make pizzas so a place can sell them by the slice. Slice of pizza, Frank Sinatra, and Yankees gear close by—THIS is New York City.

And that is just one example of what the Hidden Mickey Club can pull off. They don’t have to create a new attraction per say, they can add small lovely details to things that already exist. Other examples of places that can benefit from small inexpensive changes: Innoventions, the Ferryboat in Frontierland, Tom Sawyer Island, Club Cool, Tomorrowland Speedway, Journey to Narnia (which should just turn into The Art of Pixar in my opinion), Space Mountain (the new pre-ride stuff doesn’t cut it), Main St. USA, etc.

Bottom Line: Disney can definitely improve, but not by major changes, major additions, and new rides to rival Universal. Sometimes, it’s the little things in life that provide the most improvement. Streets of America was the example I provided because the place is a wasteland when it’s not December. The Hidden Mickey Club can definitely bring something special to the table, as it not only helps the parks, but they can also provide reasons for frequent visitors to pass by lesser-known areas.

Once again, this idea is free.

How to Improve Major League Baseball

Now that the NFL and the NBA are threatening lockouts in the coming years, Major League Baseball has a great opportunity to pick up the abandoned fans as the leagues struggle to figure out how to split the hefty profits. I know, it comes with a sense of irony since MLB went through a similar phase back in 1994 (Never Forget: Montreal Expos). But (as of now) the league has learned its lesson and although there is still no salary cap (I hate unions) baseball is just as competitive as ever as we see many small market teams manage to push around the big boys throughout the season. Last year, smaller market teams like the Rays, Braves, Reds, and Giants managed to clinch their division over more successful $$$teams like the Yankees, Cardinals, Phillies, and Dodgers. But in order to nab more fans, baseball has to clean itself just a little for the next generation of sports junkies. Baseball can still retain its extremely old-school roots, but can improve some of its “seasoning.”

Yes, for those that regularly read my blog (three of you), I have done this type of article before. But this is me expanding upon the original statements I made on how to improve baseball. First things first is the instant replay controversy. If we make it extremely simple, we can ward off all the complaints. For starters, the strike zone shall never, ever, ever, ever, ever be challenged by instant replay. Every umpire has their unique strike zone, and we must respect this to the utmost level. Some strike zones are wider than others, so as long as they are consistently calling the balls and strikes, we should let them be. The same goes with the check swings; that is strictly an umpire’s call. But once that ball is in play, we can challenge the end result. I mean this with foul calls, home runs, tags at the plate(s), fan interferences, and whether or not somebody stepped on the bases. Simple things like that.

So how many challenges should be issued? I believe in the professional tennis method: three challenges per team, if you win, you keep your challenge, and if you lose, you lose a challenge. There should be a fourth umpire at all times monitoring the ballgame somewhere hidden in the park but with complete access to all the televisions, computers, and gadgets that allows him to make the final call at a quick enough rate. Instant replay can be used in baseball without slowing it down much further. But I think a fifth umpire upstairs is necessary. Just as simple as that.

The schedule has been one of the major controversies of the NFL. They’ve wanted to increase its game total to 18. In my opinion, I prefer 16, but I don’t see many reasons why it would be a disaster to the utmost level if they were to increase it by two. Baseball on the other hand needs a subtraction. Back then, you could (barely) justify a 162-game schedule. Nowadays in this fast-paced world, 162 games is impossible to keep track of before it becomes tedious. Thank goodness it has the best playoff system in the major professional sports (and yes I include the NFL).

Now MLB is thinking of changing its playoff format, which I am totally against. These teams already play 100+ games a year; the 8 teams that make it have proven their worth and totally deserve their spot in the playoffs. Unlike the NBA and NHL, which features subpar mediocre teams managing to make it in the bottom seeds, all Major League ballclubs still standing in October deserve their standing. But, but, the schedule needs a little fixing. I believe that baseball should dip down into 126-132 games instead of the rather winding 162 games. Baseball is a very unpredictable sport, and one in which anybody can beat anybody on any given day. So, 82 games like the NBA is still a bit short, but anything over 132 would be overkill. My dream baseball season is 100 games, but realistically, if MLB were to reduce the amount of games, 132 would sound better.

And tweaking the schedule some more, I believe that there should be more Interleague, but it should be reduced to just inter-state and well-known rivalries and a lottery system, which I have discussed last year. The lottery system gives smaller market teams a chance to take on the well-known ballclubs (something like Nationals vs. Yankees, Dodgers vs. Royals, Rays vs. Cubs) and offers a little more variety to the schedule. However, I don’t think that every team should play each other at least once (like in the NBA and the NHL) because the American League and the National League are very different in terms of style of play. The NFC and AFC are similar, as well as the Western and Eastern Conference in the NBA (Although the West has been dominating for years). But in baseball, its over 100 years of history that defines the National and American League and upon deeper inspection, you’ll note most of the differences.

The marketing of baseball needs a major improvement, because like the NBA they focus only on certain teams. The NFL has by far the best marketing, because they can turn any team that makes the Super Bowl into a wonderful story. They turned the smaller-market Saints into temporary America’s Team with Drew Brees and company. Then they managed to turn a Steelers-Packers unprecedented Super Bowl into the most watched television program in history. They nearly force you to take a side and partake in the tradition of watching the big game.

While Major League Baseball can never conjure up those types of numbers (Because its best-of-seven, as opposed to best-of-um-one) they can find better ways of getting you excited for the series. There are dozens of great stories from each team: some historical, some recent. The Rangers/Giants matchup was the least-watched World Series in history, even though the Giants are amongst the most animated and unique core of players in the history of the entire sport. The Rangers could have built upon the story of how Nolan Ryan now owns a team that can win him his first World Series in 41 years. Or even build upon the suffering that the Giants went through on their first pursuit of a World Series since moving from New York way back in the 50s. But alas neither was really brought up throughout the series. Baseball has way too much history and way too many incredible stories for MLB to fail in the marketing department.

And speaking of marketing, sometimes the best marketing is viral. Viral marketing is what can propel one small incident or moment into a phenomenon, or a simple movie trailer into the most anticipated event of the year. But with MLB, they are terrible at allowing us to relive history. Good luck trying to find no-hitters, perfect games, or epic playoff moments on YouTube (that isn’t consisting of a man holding a camera and shaking it violently as a great play occurs). Baseball has the best, richest, and craziest history, and reducing its heavy restrictions on videos about the sport can allow it to thrive longer. Look at how the NBA has been a bit easier with their videos being shown online—and now we can watch the 50 greatest playoff moments (and more) online in a matter of searches. While older baseball classic moments aren't too tough to find, games in the past 4 decades are a bit more difficult to come by. We need to have the ability to see modern baseball playoff moments like this at any given moment (or this)---with good quality.

The final thing MLB must do in order to become more popular is establish a salary cap. This is going to be extremely hard with the greedy player’s union running around (I hate unions) but unless they want to continue seeing teams like the Yankees, Red Sox, and Angels spend 200 times as much as other teams because they have the dough, we will never see teams like the Rays, Royals, Athletics, and Pirates have a shot at picking up major stars. While nowadays teams are relying much more on a farm system to manufacture winning ballclubs (Athletics last decade, Rays today) just the opportunity to get stars should be presented.

Bottom Line: No professional sports organization is flawless, but baseball has the most potential to grow, especially in times which we might see a temporary lack of NFL and NBA. If we can fix the few little flaws hampering Major League Baseball, then it can develop a new audience and nudge itself closer to the NFL’s first-place position in the sports world. As baseball is my favorite sport, I’d love to see it dominate the ratings and press like it did back in the heydays. I personally think if we can reduce the number of games and slightly modernize some of its features, we can continue its resurgence in popularity.

P.S. Go Rays!!

Happy 25th Anniversary Zelda!

The Legend of Zelda is hitting its 25th anniversary this month. Easily the most legendary franchise in the history of Nintendo (and perhaps…all of gaming), Zelda has one of the most rabid and most loyal fanbases in all entertainment. The fanbase is definitely justified though, as the series has delivered great game after great game with very few disappointments in between. It has revolutionized gaming multiple times in many different ways, and has set the bar for adventure games on a consistent basis. Although the last installment hasn’t exactly thrilled me the way previous Zelda titles did, it was still better than most games out there.

In order to fully celebrate the 25th anniversary, its time for another list! In this list, I place what I think are the 10 greatest adventures in the Legend of Zelda canon. To add to that, in between songs I am mixing in masterful musical tracks that can be found in Zelda games made by the master maestro Koji Kondo. Let’s celebrate Zelda!




#10: The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass
System: Nintendo DS
Year: 2007

Picture Zelda and add an innovative mix of gameplay and exploration. Phantom Hourglass was the first of Link’s adventures in the Nintendo DS and remains his best. It’s the same old-school Zelda gameplay with a little edge of uniqueness with the extra screen and the stylus. The DS had a lot of great games, but was severely lacking in the adventure genre. Luckily, Phantom Hourglass (and to a lesser extent Spirit Tracks) was able to fill the void.




#9: The Legend of Zelda
System: Nintendo Entertainment System
Year: 1986

While the formula was improved upon many many times, the original remains a classic that set the bar much higher for video games everywhere. Not only was it the first truly epic video game in the history of Nintendo, but it’s also the first major video game that allows you to save your progress. And to top it all off, there was an entirely new quest hidden behind a password. Classic to the utmost level. Where is the remake though? Its about time it gets the Metroid: Zero Mission treatment.




#8: The Legend of Zelda: Minish Cap
System: Game Boy Advance
Year: 2005

Just like in the DS, the GBA didn’t have as many adventures in the older brother systems like the SNES, the N64, and the SNES (yes, we should mention it again). Minish Cap eliminates the cravings of a good adventure by throwing Link into another grand adventure full of fun dungeons, exhilarating gameplay, and a nice story to weave it all together. While the game isn’t as long as Link’s other quests, it definitely remains one of the best GBA games of all-time.




#7: The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker
System: Nintendo Gamecube
Year: 2003

This is an example of a video game being amazing for 3/4ths of the way, and then suddenly dropping off in quality as the climax approaches. The saddest part? This was still one of the best Gamecube games during the system’s slow and pathetic lifetime. Wind Waker suffered most from this fact: it just did not feel like Zelda sometimes. The graphics, the art style, and the absolutely daunting exploration aspect in the latter third of the game. Did not feel much like Zelda, but boy was it fun throughout most of the trip.




#6: The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
System: Nintendo Wii
Year: 2006

One part of me wants to rank this game higher. Another part of me wants to rank this game lower. Overall, this Zelda game was a vast improvement over Wind Waker, but at the same time dwelled into a familiar formula to achieve this. While most Zelda games create and introduce new gameplay elements, and sometimes at the same time perfect what is already there, Twilight Princess was epic Zelda shifted into autopilot. It is a great game, but just lacked the special edge that previous games contained. There is now too much competition in gaming for Nintendo to just shell out a familiar Zelda game. Its time for the next level. Twilight Princess could have been that next level.




#5: The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening
System: Nintendo Game Boy
Year: 1993

The game that killed the Sega Game Gear once and for all, this was a very successful and very good transition from the bigger Nintendo systems to the handheld one. Despite just using a couple of colors, Link’s Awakening delivered a massive, massive adventure with a very unique story and many gameplay elements not before seen in Link’s previous quests. This was the Game Boy being pushed to the absolute limit in terms of memory consumption, and the end result is a handheld classic that remains among the best video games in any Nintendo handheld system.




#4: The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages/Seasons
System: Game Boy Color
Year: 2001

The Game Boy Color was easily the weakest of Nintendo’s handheld systems (The Virtual Boy does not, shall not, will not count) but contained some incredibly excellent games. There was the phenomenal Wario Land 3, the underrated Metal Gear Solid, and this 1-2 legendary adventure punch of the Oracles. This is two games linked together with an extra section of the quest hidden underneath the cluster of activity and superb gameplay. Clearly one of the most underrated game(s) in history, these two games provide endless hours of absolute fun and gives you perhaps the only reason outside of Pokemon to ever use a link cable. The 3DS better have these games ready for sale immediately.




#3: The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
System: Nintendo 64
Year: 2000

Gamers wanted a more mature Zelda, especially after Wind Waker. Perhaps they should have gone back to this game, which sold a little past a million. Majora’s Mask is not only the most underrated video game in history, but it’s also one of the darkest stories gaming has ever told. This game was not as long as other video games, but whatever it lacks in length is made up for with gameplay, intensity, variety, great storytelling, wonderful musical score, and some of the cruelest challenges you’ll ever experience. It is a beautifully tragic game that is among the few out there that isn’t just a game; it’s a work of art.




#2: The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
System: Super Nintendo
Year: 1992

This isn’t a game. This is an experience. Link to the Past didn’t just overwhelm gamers back in 1992, but utterly took the genre of action/adventure and launched it so high that it would take an entire generation of gaming before any other company got even close. From the very beginning, when Link is quickly thrown into a dangerous world to the final moments, when you enter a totally different dimension, Link to the Past grabs your attention and does not let go until the final credits. The game was massive in scale from the presentation to the graphics to the soundtrack to even the sheer amount of hidden goodies present throughout this masterpiece. Link to the Past is leagues above every other video game in the SNES/Genesis generation; and still leagues above your average video game.






#1: The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
System: Nintendo 64
Year: 1998

The purists and true-blue old-schoolers will tell me that I am wrong, and should have Link to the Past in first place. And trust me when I say this, but it was tough organizing the top 3—they all deserve the top dollar. However, Ocarina of Time is…Ocarina of Time. We all know where we were and what we were doing when the game first came out. The hype machine for this was at its max and the difference between this game and most other heavily-hyped games: it met the hype and surpassed it with flying colors. This is Link and Nintendo at their absolute best: in terms of game design, presentation, music, scale, graphics, and overall quality. 1998 in gaming was all about Zelda, and all about how gaming will never be the same with this tour de force out in stores. If Nintendo had stored this much effort to more of their games, they would not have trailed so badly to Sony for 8 years.

In my opinion, the game that best represents the quality and timelessness of the Legend of Zelda is Ocarina of Time. This game brought all the things that made the previous Zelda titles great and upped the ante in scale and scope. There just aren’t enough games like this nowadays. And it stands as the best of the Zelda games. Although the previous four Zelda titles I’ve graded as a perfect 10/10, Ocarina of Time is the tallest of the 10s.



Happy 25th Anniversary, Legend of Zelda! May your legends continue to bring more memorable gameplay in the years to come.

P.S. More Music:

My Favorite OCRemix of a Zelda song


Close 2nd place:


The Trailer to the Next Zelda Game:

10 People that can improve the Jungle Cruise

The Jungle Cruise is a major hit-and-miss attraction that solely depends on your skipper. If you have a great skipper, then we definitely are in for a good time. If it’s a skipper that could not care less, then you are about to lose 10 minutes of your life that you will never get back. Now, I have assembled an epic list of epicness involving people that you and I know that should host the Jungle Cruise for at least one day. I am open to ALL suggestions, as I know I am missing people. But for now, this is my personal list of whom I would absolutely love to see work the attraction:


Pick #1: Gus Johnson

The most exciting Jungle Cruise in the history of mankind will occur as soon as this man steps up and narrates the adventure. The amount of excitement alone will make up for the fact that Hollywood Studios still has not gotten rid of their new crappy parade.

His Standout Line: "...backside of WATERRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"



Pick #2: Christopher Walken

I have no reason to explain myself.

Standout Line: "These monkeys.....got my car to turn over!"


Pick #3: Gilbert Gottfried

Loud, obnoxious, annoying, irritating, infuriating, and absolutely soul-crushing. However, he would still be a lot of fun to watch. Yelling at everything in sight. I would pay top dollar to see him mention the backside of water.

Standout Line: "THIS IS THE BACKSIDE OF WATER!!!!!! TAKE A GLANCE!!! YOU'LL PROBABLY NEVER SEE THIS AGAIN!! UNLESS YOU RIDE THIS DARN THING A SECOND TIME!! BUT WHY WOULD YOU???"



Pick #4: Robin Williams

Take his insane stand-up act, all his impressions, his relentless energy, and transfer it to the Jungle Cruise. Potential Result? Priceless.

P.S. His unpredictability might lead to his firing on day one.

Standout Line: "Do you know what this temple reminds me of? It reminds me of [censored].."


Pick #5: Samuel L. Jackson

He has one of the coolest voices in all of Hollywood. His awesomeness can save any boring trip to the Jungle Cruise.

P.S. He can only perform this at night---when the kids are gone.

Standout Line: “I’m tired of these mo------ f------- props in this mo-------- f-------- ride!!”


Pick #6: Lewis Black

The angriest and loudest comedian in show business with a heavy political slant would be perfect for this ride.

Standout Line: "Oh look, its the Republican National Convention!! I wonder what BRIGHT IDEAS they are coming with now!!"


Pick #7: Norm Macdonald

His absolute deadpan humor matches well with the dry humor of Jungle Cruise. And if all else fails, he can always play Death again…

Standout Line: "This river can go for niles, niles, and niles. And eh, if you folks don't believe me, you're inde-nile. Eh, this joke can also stretch for niles, niles, niles, niles..."


Pick #8: James Woods

He is like Christopher Walken, he makes everything automatically better. You can put him on Glee, and I will watch it religiously just because he is in it.

Standout Line: I can't even think about imitating him....



Pick #9: Stephen Colbert

Bringing the Colbert Report to the Jungle Cruise would be outstandingly hilarious.

Standout Line: "TONIGHT! We travel straight through four different rivers, multiple jungles, and even a secluded temple! Then, maybe THEN, will we find Glenn Beck's common sense."


Pick #10: Morgan Freedman

Everything he narrates turns out to be epic. Jungle Cruise would be no different. I think him narrating his life while navigating the guests through the cruise would be hilarious.

Standout Line: "I remember the first time I laid my eyes on that butterfly. His wingspan was a while 12 inches. Now, its just a measly foot.."

I know I am missing other epic potential hosts. Anyone have any ideas?

Boy am I bored.

The Greatest Films That Never Got a Best Picture Nomination

The Oscars are almost here. I have already placed my picks and the films I am rooting for. Now, it’s the unfortunate part, the remembering part. In the past, the Oscars has done a good job picking the winners (Forrest Gump, The Departed, Amadeus, Silence of the Lambs) and sometimes they don’t do well in picking the winners (Crash, Shakespeare in Love, Crash, Annie Hall---which won over Star Wars, No Country For Old Men, Crash).

However, in terms of nominations, the Oscars have had a terrible history. Some of the greatest films of all-time failed to get an Oscar nod in the ultimate prize. There are some masterpieces and groundbreaking movies that didn’t even have a shot at the ultimate prize. In this article, we are swinging into the past to find the greatest movies that never got the opportunity to go for the Best Picture prize. You’ll be surprised at some of the choices, but not because they are on the list, but because they never got nominated. Prepare to be upset.

Now, there are some excellent movies out there that don’t have the Oscar taste in them, so I will not add them to the list because no matter how good they may be, they never had the chance. I’m talking cult classics (Young Frankenstein, The Goonies), some gross-out comedies (Dumb and Dumber, There’s something About Mary), and some great movies that don’t fit that mold (Princess Bride, The Emperor’s New Groove).

Honorable Mentions (In no order):
North by Northwest
Blazing Saddles
Chicken Run
Coming to America
Gran Torino
Grease
Insomnia
Love Actually
Ocean's Eleven
For a Few Dollars More
Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl
Terminator 2
Taken
The Bourne Ultimatum
The Matrix
True Lies

Barely Missed the Cut:
#21: Who Framed Roger Rabbit
If you want to know what moment in history restarted the popularity of the old-school cartoons of Disney and Warner Brothers, look no further than here. Who Framed Roger Rabbit is one of the most creative films in the last 50 years, one of the cleverest mysteries in recent memory, and just an underrated classic that is underappreciated by not only Warner Brothers, but by Disney as well. The cartoon explosion of the 90s would have happened it had not been by the mammoth success of this great collaboration. Any movie that mixes Bugs Bunny and Mickey Mouse deserves a Best Picture nomination.

And now, the real list.


#20: Old-School Disney (Cinderella, Jungle Book, Snow White, Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh)
Walt Disney has won more Oscars than any other man in history. However, none of his movies (with the exception of Mary Poppins) had a chance at the main prize. It is a shame because Disney cranked out some unbelievable masterpieces during his life. It is hard to pinpoint which one exactly deserves the Best Picture chance the most, but personally I would have offered it to Jungle Book. Not only was it a bonafide hit, but there were a couple members of the Academy that actually dropped out because the Oscars balked at the idea of an animated movie aiming for the main prize. It wasn’t until 1991 when animation finally got its opportunity at the main prize. Unluckily for Beauty and the Beast, they went up against Silence of the Lambs.


#19: Spider-Man 2
Just like animated movies, it took a long time for comic book movies to earn respect. While the original Spider-Man was definitely a good movie, the sequel lifted the quality of the franchise to a higher level that not a single comic book movie (not even Dark Knight) has been able to reach. This movie wasn’t just superhero fun, it was deep, compelling, and a mesh of excellent acting, casting, and direction. Sequels are rarely ever nominated for Best Picture, but this was one of the greatest films of 2004, and should have gotten a chance.


#18: Minority Report
Yes, sci-fi rarely gets nominated for Best Picture (name one that actually won, and I will reward you) but Minority Report should have been an exception. Minority Report is an exceptional sci-fi thriller that was directed and filmed to near-perfection. It was sinister, gripping, extremely tense, emotionally moving, and an overall futuristic delight. What Inception wishes it could be, this movie accomplished.


#17: (500) Days of Summer
In the past couple of years, there isn’t a single romantic comedy that comes even close to the beauty, fragility, hilarity, and heartbreak of this movie. This could have been the next “Little Movie that Could” as it was an independent film that spread in popularity thanks to strong reviews and stronger word-of-mouth. A smart romantic comedy? Rarities like this have to be rewarded.


#16: Jurassic Park
This movie made us love dinosaurs. This movie pushed special effects to the next ultimate level. This movie introduced a new generation of people to the movies. This movie was intense, and one of the best summer films in the history of blockbusters. In a bit of irony, it would be Spielberg defeating Spielberg with Schindler’s List in 1993.


#15: The Breakfast Club
Few movies age as well as this one. Breakfast Club is a great, deep, and haunting look into the awful and confusing world of high school. With a minimal budget, Hughes created one of the grittiest and most realistic teenage movies in history. Every person on this earth falls into one of the five categories featured in the movie: the jock, the geek, the athlete, the rich gal, or the outcast. The fact that this movie got NO nominations for anything baffles me to this day.


#14: A Christmas Story
There are some movies with so much magic you can’t help but nominate it for Best Picture. That explains what happened to Chicago, Slumdog Millionaire, Little Miss Sunshine, and especially Forrest Gump. So why on earth did the most magical Christmas movie of all-time not even get a mention for Best Picture? This movie was watched well into the New Year, long after Christmas season was over. Why? The heavy nostalgia, the endless amount of charm, and the incredible display of humor that remains hilarious to this day. It was one of the best-directed holiday films ever, and should have gotten more nominations than it got: 0.


#13: Planes, Trains, and Automobiles
This was multiple people at their absolute best: Steve Martin and John Candy in terms of acting, and John Hughes in terms of writing and directing. This movie is hilarious at most times, and at other times really soul-crushing. There are very few Thanksgiving movies that exist, but I am very sure that they will never top the heart and quality of this masterpiece.


#12: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
It was sad enough this film didn’t win for Best Musical Score—that’s a travesty in itself. Not a travesty, an utter disgrace. Now, add the fact that the greatest western of all-time (If anyone says Unforgiven or Once Upon a Time in the West I will scream at you) does not get a Best Picture nod…that’s just a total shame. This western is gritty, epic in scale, and contains some of the best cinematography in the history of filmmaking.


#11: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Originality isn’t rewarded enough in the Oscars. There are some great stories that do get the recognition, but wonderfully unique tales just don’t stand a chance. This is about a man fighting against his memories to try to remember a relationship that had just ended. The film is a mix of romance, comedy, drama, and sci-fi. Genre mixes like this usually don’t work, but this movie was beautiful to the core. A perfect script, perfect direction, and some of the best acting performances from Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet (and even Kirsten Dunst!!). This movie needs to be seen by more people.


#10: Die Hard
I know, action films never win. Hell, even adventure films rarely get nominated. But Die Hard is a man’s man’s film. I don’t know what the Oscar needs to see in a Best Picture, but if we are going by quality, Die Hard is way up there with the best. The acting was there, the writing was there, and the direction was there. What else do you need? This movie has it. Intensity, character development, and a villain you love to hate and a hero that you have no choice but to love. Great action sequences, great fights, wonderful one-liners, and plenty of surprises are packed in this bloody gem. But no Best Picture nod.


#9: Rear Window
Hitchcock is one of the least-appreciated men in the history of film. The man’s films rarely ever get nominated, he only walked away with a special achievement Oscar, and not even his understudies got many nominations for their work. But Rear Window is no excuse. This is the best example of a suspenseful film. This is just a great example of master direction. Hitchcock knew how to grab the audiences by the neck and never let go until the final frame. Any movie that remains relentlessly entertaining despite having only ONE setting deserves a place in film history.


#8: Fight Club
You can argue this with me until you are blue in the face, but I will state the truth right here, right now: This is the best directed film to not get the Best Director nomination. David Fincher took an absolutely insane concept, an insane script, and wove one hell of a film. He took a bizarre idea and managed to turn it into a work of gritty beauty. And Oscars also like films that speak to a generation. In the past two decades, very few movies spoke to a generation in the way Fight Club did/does. And unlike the eventual Best Picture winner that same year (American Beauty--which technically also spoke to a generation of people), it ages extremely well. Fight Club is actually at its best in second and third showings. But to this day, it remains much too extreme for the Oscars to even consider.


#7: Before Sunset
This is the greatest romantic movie of all-time, with the prequel being in the top 5. This movie lacks the sex, the supporting characters, and the whimsical scenarios of your average romantic comedy. What this movie runs on is flawless acting, flawless writing, and so much realism you swear this is a documentary and not a work of art. This movie touches upon all the themes of life and love that hinder our thoughts every single day, and its ending will have you discussing the work for days. This is a damn good film, and should have had the chance to go up for Best Picture. Freakin' Sideways was nominated for Best Picture that year...come on now.


#6: Finding Nemo
Go back to early 2003. The animation department in Disney was dying, Shrek had kicked Disney in the pants with its anti-Disney content that won them plenty of money and the first Best Animated Picture Oscar. And then came Finding Nemo and all the momentum shifted. Finding Nemo is the first computer-animated movie in history I can essentially call: beautiful. This movie was beautiful, entertaining, hilarious, and full of so many wonderful characters, you can't help but root for everybody (except Darla). This is still Pixar's best film and the movie that would prove that Pixar wasn't just an animation studio, it was a studio trying to save animation.


#5: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Raiders of the Lost Ark is the greatest adventure movie in history, and got the nomination (even though it lost to....Chariots of Fire...). So why on earth is the third installment, nearly as good as the first, getting the shaft? Did they not see this movie? This movie has it all: adventure, action, romance, religious undertones, subtle themes, comedy, and some of the greatest stuntwork in film history. This was the best film of 1989, hands-down. Especially better than who eventually won....Driving Miss Daisy. Seriously?


#4: Back to the Future
If you are not angry yet, you better be upon seeing that one of the best sci-fi movies of all-time didn't even get the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay. One of the coolest, smartest, hippest, and cleverest movies of the 80s has the heart, soul, and quality of a Best Picture nominee. And to top it off, remains the only major sci-fi film that truly works a great formula for time traveling. Darn it, its Back to the Future! One of the best films ever! Not even a Best Picture nod? Really?

Now, let's REALLY get angry.





#3: The Empire Strikes Back
The greatest sequel ever. Only two sequels have ever won Best Picture and neither of them are even as close as good as Empire. Ten points if you mention the two. Anyway, Empire Strikes Back created the trend and the benchmark for all blockbuster sequels from here on out: darker plot, same cast with more characters, sinister turns, everything that made the original great except adding more layers, more special effects, and the raising of the stakes. So the question is: why does a superior sequel to one of the 25 best films of all-time not get a Best Picture nomination? Some things don't make sense.


#2: City of God
Of all the movies on this list, I can nearly guarantee you this is the one viewed by the least amount of people. Nonetheless, its hands-down one of the most underrated movies of all-time, and its underrated behavior comes because its a film from a country not known for making movies. Brazil out of nowhere delivered an extremely potent and powerful filmmaking punch with a movie that has the action of a blockbuster, the choreography of a great martial arts movie, the cinematography of a flawless western, and the quality drama of a Best Picture. This movie is technically and artistically flawless, and hands-down one of the most brutal and phenomenal movies you'll ever see. And not even a Best Foreign Language Film nomination, that's just downright upsetting.




#1: Kill Bill Vol. 2
This should not be a surprise to you. I had done a list of the greatest films from the 2000s, and this movie topped the list. So it would make sense for me to name this the greatest film not to get a Best Picture nod. Despite the 15-minute standing ovation during its first screening, despite the ishload of good reviews, despite the fact that the Academy owes Tarantino an Oscar for not handing him Best Picture for the post-modern classic Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill Vol. 1 nor 2 ever got a chance for the main prize. Even though (like Fight Club) it is a bit extreme for the Oscar voters, this movie has the magic, the majestic direction, and the sheer quality to at least deserve a nomination. This isn't just a work of art, it is a movie that clearly loves movies, as it has dozens of homages and references sprinkled throughout this inches-from-perfect film. Kill Bill is one of the 10 best films of all-time--and does not have a Best Picture nomination.


That makes me very, very upset. Almost as much as knowing that Crash won a couple years ago.

Think I missed a movie? Think there is a movie that should not be on this list? Well, speak up.


83rd Annual Academy Awards
February 27th, 2011

This Post is now about the White Stripes

The White Stripes apparently have broken up earlier this month, in a very quiet fashion. I guess the quietness surrounding the news of their breakup isn’t much of a shock since they never were that extremely popular a band. More people know OF them, but not many ever truly followed their career when compared to other rock bands in the same era. I however loved the duo, right up to their last album. Jack White is one of the greatest guitarists in the history of music, as he is able to create so much magnificent music with just one guitar and a drummer that has a very minimalist style. He can make White Stripes sound like two full-length bands playing at the same time by will.

White Stripes easily ranks as one of the best rock acts of the new millennium, as there is a major shortage of good rock out there right now. This article is now about them, as I count down their greatest songs throughout their all-too-short career.

Special Mention:
~In the Cold, Cold, Night
~Seven Nation Army
~Icky Thump (Their most successful song)



#7: Blue Orchid
I know the White Stripes prefer things in threes, but there are way too many good songs from them to narrow the list to a mere triplet. The first song on our countdown has a much distorted sound, a very distorted pace, and a heavy garage rock riff. But it flows beautifully thanks to great drumming, amazing guitar work, and an edgy attitude to the entire production.



#6: Dead Leaves and the Dirty Ground
Part of the appeal of White Stripes is their ability to crank out a good song with simple melodies, simple riffs, and simple drum lines. This song is perhaps the best example of their talent in simplicity, as there is nothing outstandingly talented about the tune—its just a wicked fun song to listen to.



#5: Fell in Love With a Girl
The song is less than two minutes long, but the energy streaming from the guitars and drums can last a lifetime. Accompanied by a great music video, this song put the duo on the map thanks to its fast pace, out-of-the-ordinary sound, and heavy aura of garage rock that you just don’t hear enough of nowadays.




#4: I Just Don’t Know What to do With Myself
In perhaps Jack White’s best vocal performance, this song is mighty sad, and mighty short, and mighty good. The song contains multiple slow build-ups, and they are all followed by multiple musical explosions of guitars, drums, and sadness. Makes for a great Valentine’s Day song.



#3: Black Math
Perhaps the least-recognized song on my list, Black Math is purely a guitar song. This incredible display of six-string goes through multiple speeds, multiple sounds, and is bridged together by an excellent breakdown and guitar solo. Oh, and did I mention it kicks more arse than any metal song you can come up with within the last decade?



#2: We are going to be Friends
The ONLY good thing about Napoleon Dynamite was this song. Repeat, ONLY thing. This song is childhood innocence, childhood love, and childhood nostalgia wrapped into one. The guitar this time was tuned down and even simpler than usual—and the toned-down production works like a beautiful charm. Find me a flaw in this song, and I will correct you.





#1: The Hardest Button to Button
Technically perfect. Artistically perfect. Perfect riff. Perfect blending of drums and guitar. This song is very simple, and yet extremely catchy, extremely entertaining, and the very best reason why the White Stripes are one of my favorite artists within the past two decades. I know I won’t have many people agree with me here, but this personally is one of my all-time favorite songs.


White Stripes, you will be missed.