This is a continuation of a series of blog entries about how I would fix Walt Disney World. My crazy plan, which I call the Disney Walkabout, demands the closing of one park for a year, so it can be tweaked upon, fixed, changed, and given a brand new makeover. The order goes as follows: Animal Kingdom, Hollywood Studios, Epcot, and lastly, Magic Kingdom. With the park closed an entire year, it gives all the workers and Imaginneers all the time and space in the world to do some drastic changes that they could never do if there are guests involved. Enjoy, and feel free to make any suggestions or arguements.
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Part 4: Magic Kingdom
Perhaps the toughest park to fix would be Magic Kingdom, simply because of all the tradition placed inside and the potential for backlash would be that much greater. For example, I would love for the Adventurer’s Club to be placed in Adventureland because of their connections to the Jungle Cruise, but because of the lack of alcohol, it would not become possible. While you don’t need drinks to improve the concept of the Club, lacking the alcohol would be upset a good group of people. That is why I plan for Adventurer’s Club to be placed instead in Animal Kingdom. Now, we shall start with Main Street USA.This is one of my favorite sections of the park because of all the details and wonderful food. There really isn’t much to change here, but here are some things I’d love to add.
For starters, in the “arcade” portion of Main St., I would add a small theater that displays old-school Disney cartoons the entire time, rather than use all that space for merchandise. Most of that merchandise can be moved to the other side. The only other subtle change would be to Casey’s Corner. For starters, I’d love to see more tables in that general area. Inside Casey’s Corner there is a large screen that repeats the same narrations about sports as we see snippets of Disney sports cartoons. One of two things should happen here: whether show entire cartoons about sports (because they are indeed hilarious, especially the Goofy ones), or show clips of old-school baseball, from the Babe Ruth days through the Willie Mays days. But that is the baseball fan in me screaming for more baseball-related stuff here.
The castle itself and the courtyard area couldn’t be more perfect, this spot is a photographer’s dream come true. So many nice shots. My only change would be to remove the thousands of lightbulbs that are scattered on the castle. Yes it is a hassle taking them off, but Disney is all about details, right? I don’t want to see those lightbulbs as I am taking a close-up shot of the castle. Moving right we will encounter Tomorrowland, that desperately needs a bit of fixing. For starters, this is what must go: Stitch, Monster’s Inc. Laugh Floor, and Buzz Lightyear Spaceranger Spin. The Stitch ride is a travesty and an embarrassment. Tomorrowland is supposed to be about the future, what is Stitch and Buzz doing here?
If you remember in the nifty Tomorrowland Transit Authority Peoplemover, there is a nice model of the community of tomorrow. I would expand that and turn the Stitch/Alien Encounter area into a walk-in attraction that showcases what the future should look like. Basically, a massive version of the model in that can be seen in the Authority. Show futuristic houses, businesses, modes of transportation, and more. It is the future; your imagination can run wild with this concept. Moving to the other side, the entire area where Buzz and Mike can be seen should be transformed into one ride. This ride will be a tour of the Milky Way Galaxy, as we go from Earth through the asteroid belt, through Jupiter and Saturn, and far beyond Pluto. Picture a ride with the speed and detail of Spaceship Earth, but the theming is space travel instead of progress of communication.
Now, the Carousel of Progress should stay because it was one of Walt Disney’s favorite achievements. But, with consistency to the theme of Tomorrowland, they should update the very final scene. A variety of the things happening in the final scene have already been according for quite some time now. Time to fix the Carousel finale and make it what our world should be, not what it has already become.
Moving on to Space Mountain. Space Mountain’s so-called update was in my opinion very half-assed. Disney used to be the frontrunner of attraction technology, but suddenly find themselves re-imagining plans of the Fantasyland expansion because Universal’s Harry Potter has become a huge hit. Space Mountain’s revival was embarrassing because all they did was smooth out the track and make it darker. Big deal. Disneyland’s Space Mountain I’ve been told destroys this one in every possible way. Space Mountain needs a totally new track, and should reduce itself from two tracks into one to make more space for more twists, turns, and drops. My version of Space Mountain would be faster, actually has a more coherent storyline, is darker, and contains a soundtrack.
The Tomorrowland Transit Authority needs to regain its more futuristic tone that it lost when they changed the narrator. Other than the tone, this ride is perfect for relaxing or waiting for a fastpass to become eligible. Let’s amp up the air conditioning though, I’ve noticed Disney has made the ride a bit more humid to cut costs. The Tomorrowland Speedway needs a totally different look, as its image totally contradicts anything future. The cars should look slicker, the track should be extended a bit more, the cars themselves should be faster, and you should be able to keep track of who is “winning” and who is “losing,” for competitive purposes. The track being extended is indeed possible, since Toontown Fair is ceasing to exist. One way to utilize all the added space is making the Speedway a lengthier experience.
Now, the question is what should we do with all the newfound space? If it honestly were up to me, I would bring back some retired attractions to fill in some of the Fantasyland space. I would bring back Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride, which was a grade-A classic, and also bring back 20,000 Leagues under the Sea, but use modern-day technology to not make it such a hassle to maintain. Also, Magic Kingdom is missing a trippy Alice in Wonderland ride, as well as an Aladdin ride. The magic carpets in Adventureland need to go, but a simulation of the Cave of Wonders sequence from the movie would be absolutely awesome. Imagine that you are seated on a magic carpet and it takes you through the entire cave, climaxing in a fast-paced sequence with you trying to escape. The Belle castle should still happen though, as Beauty and the Beast is one of the greatest animated films in history.
Mickey and Minnie’s houses should remain, but the entire street should be expanded some more to include other classic Disney characters like Donald, Daisy, Donald’s extensive family, Pete, and more. As for Goofy’s Barnstormer, that should be extended to become a full-length roller coaster that occupies the entire area that used to be Mickey’s Toontown Fair. It becomes a fast ride and a nice view of the Magic Kingdom. So basically, all the stuff I would add in the land that has yet to be built, would be 20,000 Leagues, Mr. Toad, Alice, Aladdin, longer Barnstormer, Belle’s castle, and the Little Mermaid ride. If we still have room after all this, then a nice Casey Jr. roller coaster ride is in order from Dumbo; as you ride a train that goes through all kinds of terrain before a rounding finale on the mountain. Picture this as a calmer version of Big Thunder (because I do have plans for “enhancing” Big Thunder).
Any change needed in the Fantasyland rides themselves? Only two: Peter Pan’s Flight and Philharmagic. Can we please make Peter Pan a lot longer than its one-minute running time? Can we please add more scenes and more details so it can truly justify its insane wait time? As for Philharmagic, I would love to see more of the old-school Disney being represented throughout the movie. Make it a little bit longer. If anyone says anything about Haunted Mansion needing a change, I will shun you for life, that attraction is nearly perfect. As for Liberty Square itself, it isn’t too bad; perhaps a little more American history would help the Hall of Presidents.
Tom Sawyer Island is the next area that will undergo a drastic change. Now, for anyone that has taken the riverboat around Tom Sawyer Island, you’ll notice that there is still a lot of land in that general area. If it were up to me, I would expand Tom Sawyer Island to include some of the land across the river. Now how would guests reach that without interfering with the riverboat? Why going underneath of course. Add a couple extra caves, and have them connect the island with some of the space across the river. With that space we can have more playgrounds, more caves, more checkerboards, and more picnic areas. Tom Sawyer Island is a very underrated attraction, as it serves as a nice relaxation point and a great playground for kids. I would also re-open the ice cream place that used to run in the Island.
Big Thunder Mountain Railroad is an excellent attraction, up until the final act. The final third of the ride isn’t as thrilling or as crazy as the first two, but we can fix that. In my opinion, during the final big turn of the ride, the train should run underneath the track and through a hidden cave underneath, and then connect to the same major speck of land that is across from Tom Sawyer’s Island. We can use all this land to expand the ride even more. Build more mountains, more rocky structures, and make the attraction much, much bigger. Big Thunder is a classic in its own right, but really needs a grand finale—and should be faster. Another fun detail that should be added; whenever a kid or adult fires a shotgun on Tom Sawyer’s Island, the sound effect should be heard on the other side as you are passing through aboard the train.
Moving to Adventureland, Pirates of the Caribbean should be extended a bit to include the second drop and added scenes found in the Disneyland version. Also, remove Jack Sparrow. Keep the show that he does outside the attraction, but remove him from the ride; he is not necessary. Adding more pirates all over the ride couldn’t hurt either. Now, this idea strictly depends on just how much land is available in the Adventureland side. I would add the Journey to the Center of the Earth attraction that they have in DisneySea over in Tokyo. The only difference is, don’t make the mountain too tall, or build it heavily below level so it doesn’t overpower the height of the castle. Adventureland needs a thrill ride, and Journey would be the solution. For those that don’t know, Journey is a roller coaster that uses the technology from Test Track as you head inside the center of the earth and encounter all the bizarre creatures located inside.
The Jungle Book and Tarzan surprisingly get no love from Adventureland. While Tarzan is forgivable, The Jungle Book is a Disney classic that deserves its own river ride. There should be an outdoor Jungle Book attraction that places you down a river and through scenes from the movie, ending with Mowgli finding his home. The Jungle Cruise is fine the way it is, but the queue line should include old-school music like in Disneyland, including music from the Ink Spots, Burl Ives, and others. The Tiki Room should revert to the original, no questions asked. And upon that last change, we have toured all of Magic Kingdom in full-circle.
Bottom Line: The Magic Kingdom Walkabout: revamp Tomorrowland, extend the speedway, bring back retired attractions, extend multiple attractions like Barnstormer, Pirates, Big Thunder, Tom Sawyer, add in a few thrill rides, include an Alice and Aladdin ride, and add a great thrill ride in Adventureland. It is much tougher to recommend changes on a smaller park and one with so much tradition and history, but Magic Kingdom is due for a face-lift, and I think all these changes would definitely improve upon near-perfection.
Part 3
Part 2
Part 1
In part 5...I will unveil my dream theme park...be ready..
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