Seven Comedians That Need to make a Stand-Up Comedy Film

Kevin Hart's Let Me Explain is an amazingly successful tour-de-force that disproves the notion that stand-up comedies won't quite make it on the big screen. If you are a funny enough and respected enough comedian, you can definitely stand in front of an audience for an hour, film yourself doing so, and make millions presenting it to others that never quite have had the chance to actually see you live. Laughter is contagious, and seeing these kinds of films in movie theaters gives the stand-up that extra edge.



Kevin Hart is not the funniest man out there, but his career is resembling Eddie Murphy's epic 80s run the best: a good mix of lower-budget films mixed in with performances being shown on the big screen. This type of formula works well and it advertises your upcoming projects that much better. I assure you that because of Let Me Explain, his January 2014 collaboration with Ice Cube will have a much better chance of being successful.

That being said, I am compiled a short list of comedians whom I would love to see hit the big screen and have a temporary shot at big screen stardom. Some have been on the big screen, some have not,but overall these are seven people I would love to see tackle a stand-up comedy movie---uncut, untamed, and with plenty of wiggle room to get creative.

Honorable Mention:
1) Jim Gaffigan: He is arguably the most underrated comedian out there, as his jokes-per-minute ratio stands as among the best. Look how many he spit out in this one clip alone.

2) Louis C.K.: The highest-acclaimed comedian out there has done films already and even had one at Sundance, but I would like to see one with even more studio support

3) Whose Line is it Anyway Cast: An uncut version of the regular staff with 80-100 minutes of potential material to hit the big screen. Potential is great.




#7:Jerry Seinfeld

He is not everyone's cup of tea. His humor is extremely dry, very thick, subtle, sarcastic, and worded so intricately it would drive the sanest of people up the wall. That being said, his observational humor ran the 90s with his sitcom and his stand-up. His witty and fun pokes at daily life made the show as maddening and as timeless as it currently stands. I would love to see him attempt to tackle the 2010s and all the random things that occur in the world. He defeated the 90s. He should take on this current decade as well.



#6: Chris Tucker

Wasted talent. The man has been in ONE non Rush Hour movie since 1998. Are you kidding me? The man that stole every scene in Friday, the same man that pulled a great stand-up career, only ONE movie? And a drama that gave him 5 scenes??? No, I know the man is funny, and its up to the nonrestrictive big screen to allow the dog off the leash. Tucker, please come back. Please oh please.



#5: Conan O'Brian

Amazing writer. Great host. Hilarious man altogether. Conan gave us snippets of his uncut material with his Don't Stop documentary but we didn't see enough. Not enough at all. I would love to actually see him pull off one of these shows in its entirety for all of us to see. He can sing, he can play the guitar, he can (sort of) dance, and he can kill an audience with an abundance of great skits and jokes. While he is far cleaner and more controlled on TBS (most likely because of his fears of repeating an NBC incident), him on the big screen would be his big chance to truly go the whole nine yards.




#4: Chris Rock

Arguably the best alive comedian out there, even if he hasn't performed as much stand-up in recent years. Since the 90s he has been involved with more memorable quips and skits than any other comedian, including one that created so much controversy (the one I posted) he can't repeat it again. He is Kevin Hart on steroids, speed, and cocaine. He loves to rile up an audience in a heartbeat while backstab America with his take on politics and the way things are. Chris Rock is one of the legends, and the thing with legends is----you always want to see them, regardless of how many times you have seen them before.




#3: Eddie Murphy

Can I remind you all that this man conquered the 80s in cinema and also in stand-up? This man conquered Saturday Night Live, conquered comedy, and was well on his way to become one of the most recognizable entertainers in the last 100 years. And all this happened before the 90s when it started going downhill. And before the 2000s when it nearly hit rock bottom. And then before Norbit....ugh. Murphy almost attempted a comeback with an Oscar hosting gig until Brett Ratner ruined the chance for everybody. You need to come back to the big screen with new material, a new edge, and re-assert yourself as one of the greats. It would be a damn shame if your reputation erases what you did in the 80s.






#2: Dave Chappelle

Had the greatest sketch show in history. That's right, I rank it above the inconsistent Saturday Night Live. The Chappelle Show was glorious, every episode was funny, some skits will go down in h.i.s.t.o.r.y. as some of the greatest moments television has ever seen. But we all forget that his stand-up was downright on point as well. He has the charisma, he has the talent, and has the ability to pull off a legendary stand-up comedy movie to the likes of Pryor and Murphy. But...he needs a comeback. He dropped off the face of the earth after Africa, with little appearances here and there. I want him to come back, and the big screen would make for a great opening platform. Can you imagine a Chappelle Show-like movie?

P.S. Block Party doesn't count. That was far back in 2005.....too long ago.











#1: Bill Cosby


Bill. Freakin'. Cosby. The man is a bonafide legend that made only one film. Only one, and it still stands as one of the greatest you will ever see. He is a gifted storyteller, a decent human being, clean cut for the family to listen, and overwhelmingly one of the biggest influences to most of the comedians on this list. I would love to see a swan song of this legend as he makes one more movie, just one more. Tell your stories, spit your subtle (not as subtle as it used to be) politics, and please give us another taste of your stand-up that remains golden, that ages like fine wine, and is layers above almost every comedian before and after your glory days.

He remains one of my favorite comedians, and one of the remaining legends from the 80s, a time in which Pryor, Murphy, Seinfeld, Kingston, Carlin had their greatest years and greatest moments behind the microphone. While Bill Cosby's name won't have the mass market appeal of the others on this list, I can guarantee you it will still deliver. Simply because Bill Cosby rarely ever disappoints.

Yes, I did forgive him for Ghost Dad.

Red Sox/Rays: The New Top Baseball Rivalry

Ladies and gentlemen, I present you the top rivalry this season:

The Red Sox and Rays do not have a storied history.

They have not had many postseason showdowns.

They are not geographically close.

However, these two teams hate each other. The two fanbases aren't major fans of each other. And biggest of all, they are two of among the five best teams in baseball and are currently competing for the same division title.

And this bears repeating, they really, really hate each other.

The Red Sox and Yankees rivalry has boiled down considerably because the fights have diminished, the trash talk has toned down, and both teams have not really had similar records in recent years.



But the Rays and Red Sox are just one game apart right now. And just went through a tough, tough matchup that had layers of emotions boiling over. And this game and the Twitter war that followed is just the latest chapter in a string of run-ins that have become increasingly hostile and intense.

If you want to know when it all started, it was far back in 2000 when Pedro Martinez bullied the Devil Rays by hitting the very first batter, started a brawl, and then nearly tossed a no-hitter to follow the hit batsman. Just a month later, the Devil Rays managed to become the team to eliminate them that season, and resulted in the closer Roberto Hernandez waving good-bye to the Sox bench.

A few years of exchanges of close pitches, hits, near-fights, and verbal jabs, 2008 gave us the next chapter of the rivalry when things really took off. Both teams were fighting to be on top of the standings, and we then got this:



And then, Tampa did this to Boston:





And...well....this happened:




The biggest reasons for the rivalry is because of the very different fanbases involved, because of the role-reversal in terms of style of play and success, and because each team has been a major road block to each others' recent success---with Tampa causing more damage in recent years.

Boston lives and dies with their sports teams. Few cities passionately love their teams more than Boston. And on the other side of the coin you have the tortured fanbase of the Devil Rays/Rays, that have to compete with Red Sox Nation, Yankees Universe, and the Phillie Phanatics within their own territory. The Rays fans aren't as vocal, aren't as easy to find on television (Amongst the worst attendance in baseball since 1998), and are quite fed up with the bullying ways of the competition and the fans that always seem to outnumber them 4:1. It does get a bit jarring and irritating whenever you see a Rays game in Tampa and see more fans of the opposition.

Back in the day, Boston was known as the blue collar tough-as-nails organization that usually rounded up players willing to risk their lives for a win to represent the Sox. Now the Red Sox Nation has created a huge fanbase leading to huge amounts of money to spend on winning players. In terms of payroll, now the Red Sox are high up there with the Yankees, Angels, and Dodgers. The Rays on the other hand consist of rejected players from other franchises, rookies trying to make an impression, and heapings of unpopular role players that always manage to mesh together thanks to the artistry of Joe Maddon. To the Tampa Bay Rays, the Red Sox are just like the Yankees---rich, popular, and with a sentiment that they are more entitled to their success than others.

In the Rays' recent jarring quest for their first ring, the Red Sox are constantly there trying to get in the way. And this season, with arguably the best Rays lineup in its history, the urgency is there. With the Red Sox this season, they are trying to restore the image of the franchise that was absolutely tarnished after their ridiculous 2011 collapse and their awful season with Bobby Valentine.

This division ain't big enough for the two of them. And this is why the rivalry is picking up steam heading towards September.

And baseball is loving every single second of it.

The Lone Ranger: 8/10

So if it looks like a Western, feels like a Western, sounds like a Western, and paces like a Western.....

Then it must be a Western, right? So why is it getting so much slack for being a new-age spaghetti western? Yes The Lone Ranger is a mess. Yes it has an extremely poor script. And yes, it definitely has some jarring tonal shifts. However this movie is still entertaining, still beautifully and skillfully directed by mild-indie-at-heart Gore Verbinski, and still has some great performances that add life to a script that has no clue where it wants to go. In the midst of the bloated budget and issues lies a decent movie that will indeed keep you on your toes.

There are many theories I have towards why everyone is panning this film: it could be the Johnny Depp/Disney overkill we have seen this past decade, it could be that Westerns don't have the appeal that they used to, and lastly it might be the anti-American taint that viewers might get out of the movie. Whatever the reason, The Lone Ranger might be a film that will be dissected for years to come simply because it is a breathing contradiction in so many ways.

It runs as both a homage to Westerns (There are nods to John Ford and Sergio Leone classics) while also becoming an anti-Western that disassembles the stereotypes and misconceptions of the Wild West (Similar to what Unforgiven did in the 90s). The movie can be quite comical, but also deathly serious not too long before and not too long after. The movie poses as a pure Western at times, while at other times throwing some major supernatural elements for good measure. And lastly it can play like a kid's fantasy, while at the same time it throws some heavy undertones about race, class, and Manifest Destiny.

The biggest reason for the quality of this origin story is the incredible direction by Gore Verbinski. Verbinski, whether you love him or hate him, can take any terrible script and can craft some magic out of it. The Mexican, At World's End, and The Lone Ranger are great examples of terrible scripts being saved because of Verbinski's attention to detail, ability to carve a great action sequence, and ability to always have a slight indie edge over the typical Hollywood director. Love or hate Johnny Depp, he still breathes layers of life and personality to the usually one-note partner Tonto. Artie Hammer, despite awkwardly being second banana despite being the main character, excels as the famed hero with the smaller dosage of material given.

Just like your average blockbuster, if you can stomach some of the setbacks then you will have a good time. With the Lone Ranger it takes longer for the movie to take off, but once it does you will marvel at the cinematography, laugh at Depp and Hammer's chemistry (and hidden visual humor), and get blown away by the final action sequence that will stand as the most creative you'll see all summer.

The Lone Ranger is what happens when you try to mix a Western with a blockbuster personality—it's a tough oil/water mix but it still works thanks to the creative and potentially bizarre Western-loving mind of Gore Verbinski.